We're Going to Dizzzz-neeeee!!

Second week in February! I'm so stinkin' excited! I can't decide if it's more excitement over the destination (since I've never been) or the fact that I don't have to be at work for a whole week.

Jenny & Dylan will be there the same week, but I don't anticipate seeing them much, since they're on vacay too. I thought at some point we might get together for a lunch or something to mutually revel in the Disney-ness. I imagine the conversation might go something like this:

Abby & JT: Hey guys!

Jenny & Dylan: Hey!

A & J: How's it going?

J & D: Well, Disney World is pretty f-ing awesome.

A & J: I know, right? Disney World is totally the coolest.

J & D: We're starvin' like Marvin. You wanna eat?

A & J: Sure.

*Munch Lunch Munch*

A & J: Allright, well, we'll catch ya on the fliptastic.

J & D: Sweet and Awesome! Bye!

...aaaaaand *Scene*

Shortest. Script. Ever.
I should totally write for this show.

In other news...
1. Christmas
2. New Year's
3. Slightly Chubbier
4. Joined YMCA
5. Earned free cruise

JT and I earned a free cruise by going to a "Short, 90-minute presentation" on a time share vacation facility on Lake Conroe (aka "Piney Woods Paradise"). Our appointment was at 12:30, so we decided to get there a little early so as not to miss our appointment--a point that the guy on the phone was adamant about not missing. An hour and a half later, we finally got someone to take us on the tour. He said, "Hope you haven't been waiting long."

"Well," we said, "actually we have."
"Oh, no! Well, don't worry. I'm one of the fastest guys out here," he assured us.

After a questionnaire, a walk-thru, and alot of sell!sell!sell!, we finally took the tour. After the tour and some more sell!sell!sell!, we got back to the clubhouse to listen to the financials. We weren't buying--too expensive. Our sales guy handed us off to his skeezy "manager" for some more sales pitching and "special offers" (at this point, I find it necessary to point out that our salesman was really a nice guy and good at sales. His "manager" was pretty slimy.) Still, no go. We were then handed off to a third guy (the manager's "manager") who tried to hand us a rock-bottom offer. Dude. Seriously. We are poor.

So, that guy kicked us to the curb and pointed us in the direction of the "losers' room" where we could get our "free gift." But, just as we stepped on the doormat, a trapdoor opened up and we fell into a pit full of hungry alligators! And poisonous snakes!!

...Just kidding about that last part, but I wouldn't have been surprised. Anyway, we got a cruise in which we have to pay port fees of $128 per person, but I think it's a steal for a 4-day cruise to Cozumel. If you've got iron-clad reserve, I would totally recommend doing it for a free/cheap vacation...but forget that "90-minute" crap. We were outta there in no fewer than 5 1/2 hours--but it was worth it (mostly to see the disappointment on their faces when they didn't sucker us.)

Holiday Cheerleaders

I love the Holiday Season from Thanksgiving through New Year's Day--the sights, sounds, smells, and traditions of all cultures, the general feeling of goodwill toward men. There is something about the feelings of warmth and comfort inside while the weather rages outside, bidding you to stay in.

There is one thing that fills me with rage, however.

That thing (and I say this every year) is the retail push for rampant commericalism and consumerism. How am I supposed to cherish this "time of year" when it's shoved down my throat year-round? Hobby Lobby begins selling Christmas trees in August. The garden center in Wal-Mart is transmogrified into a Santaland freakshow of Toy-Department Spillover in early November. Stores begin playing traditional Christmas Carols in October as if they should actually mean something to you. To me, this last transgression is by far the sacrilege of the whole issue. I can understand playing Santa songs and winter songs to promote gift-buying feelings, but leave my Jesus songs out of it. It is an insult to my religious sensibilities to have the Prince of Peace advertising for Guitar Hero 3.

...So I've been baking. Specifically, chocolate cranberry oat bars and marbled chocolate treats I found in my Kraft magazine. Baking has revealed itself to me as a way to focus and relax and gain about 25 pounds.

...So I've also been dieting. And exercising. Hopefully, being in better shape will help me to combat the Evil Forces of GimmeGimme during this 4-month-long Holiday Season.

Songs About America

Today we drove through Tennessee from Nashville to Knoxville, up through Kentucky, finally coming to rest at an overpriced Days Inn (after checking about sixty jillion other hotels--but that's another story altogether).

Y'know how sometimes you're riding down the road and the perfect song comes on the radio? That happened to me today. I was driving as we were coming out of Nashville, and, if you know anything about Tennessee you know that every 9 out of 10 radio stations are Country and Western. So, we decided to skip the radio and play our iPod through the radio transmitter. One of my Ryan Adams songs came on from the "Cold Roses" album, Let it Ride. He sings a nice little Country/Bluegrass ditty about the Cumberland River and Tennessee--just as we were driving through that area. It was nice.

So, as we set out this morning, we were discussing famous items and persons pertaining to Tennessee, such as Davy Crockett, former U.S. Representative from Tennessee and hero at the Battle of the Alamo. I learned a lot about Davy Crockett today. For example, did you know:

1. That Davy Crockett was born on a mountaintop in Tennessee?
2. ...that he killed him a bar when he was only three?
3. ...that he was King of the Wild Frontier?
4. ...that he was portrayed poorly and inaccurately by Billy Bob Thornton in the movie The Alamo (2004)?
5. ...that he had a giant blue ox named Babe and that he loved flapjacks?
6. ...that he wrote the Declaration of Independence and discovered electricity?

I know! Impressive resume'. Davy Crockett is also known to have worn an upside down pot on his head and carried a bag of apple seeds, sprinkling them across the land.

Today was a good drive. The countryside was absolutely beautiful. I love driving in the mountains. There's a surprise around every corner. Tomorrow we'll drive a short distance to Cleveland for my friend Megan's wedding, and then we're headed quickly over to Grand Rapids to go to Mars Hill for church Sunday morning. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that we get free Church Picnic Lunch!

Brother, Can You Spare Some Common-Damn-Sense??

Okay, so I haven't really heard the entire story, but I did hear the audio clip. Whoopi Goldberg defended Michael Vick's dog fighting/gambling habit because it's "part of the Southern culture?" I am not from the Deep South. Perhaps I am not understanding the culture so good (imagine Slavic accent). I'm from Texas, though, and we do share some common Southern traditions with GA, AL, MS, and LA. Among some of these shared traditions are the culinary delights of iced tea, cornbread, and grits. We follow our dessert with coffee. It's the home of Southern Baptism and some remainder of gentility.

Among these, setting starved, beaten, angry, scared animals on each other for pure enjoyment IS NOT.

It's like saying that if you come from a lower-class neighborhood where developing a crack or crystal meth habit is "part of the culture" then it is permissable and perhaps encouraged for you to also develop a crack or crystal meth habit.

Why defend the guy? Is it because he's a celebrity? Is it because he's African-American? Is it because he's a bazillionaire that can get away with whatever he wants because he's got bazillions of dollars to cover his tracks?

Yes.

See: "Justice" for Paris & Lindsey

I know, I know...

I haven't written a single thing since January!! I've been busy being a newlywed...Although I don't know really to whom I am apologizing. I'm not sure who really reads this blog religiously, but I'm sure there's someone out there. So I'm sorry already!

July 29th is my Grandmother's birthday. She's now 79 years young. She lives over on the other side of town by the Exxon-Mobil refinery(ies). She's been living in the same house that my Grandfather built for the past 37 years. My grandparents (Memaw and Papaw) moved into that pink-brick house after moving from the home my mother grew up in--a wood-frame house over natural gas lines that has since been torn down. Occasionally, in a fit of nostalgia, Mom will drive us by the site and say wistfully, "That's where our house used to be, and there's the tree my Daddy and I planted."

Papaw planted the plum and pear trees that are now in Memaw's backyard. The pear tree has always borne fruit since I can remember--big hard pears that were crunchy like apples and difficult to peel--but Memaw always struggled to get plums from the plum tree. This year she had her biggest yield ever: 10 plums. There's also a weeping willow tree where my Papaw built a swing for me. I was the first grandchild for my mother's parents, so I was Papaw's pride and joy until my brother Andy came along. Then we were both his pride and joy. My cousins weren't born until after his death in 1986.

I remember when my mother got the call that Papaw had passed away. She was very calm. He had been diagnosed with melanoma some time before. I don't remember when he got sick, or how long he endured chemotherapy, but I remember seeing him waste away. He changed so much that I remember being a little afraid of him. What was left of his hair fell out from the medicine, and Memaw asked me if I liked Papaw's hair and I said "No, but I still love Papaw." I think I was four or five years old.

After Papaw died, my brother and I were the only grandchildren for a couple of years until my cousin Madelen was born in 1988. Weekends at Memaw's were joyous. We would stay Friday night and wake up on Saturday morning to watch cartoons--Smurfs, He-Man, Thundercats, Garfield, Ghostbusters, etc., etc.--and eat the junky cereals that our parents wouldn't allow. I went through a Froot Loops and a Cookie Crisp phase, while Andy was pretty much steady on Lucky Charms for the longest time. Memaw would usually take us to the mall on Saturday afternoon where we would see a movie and she would buy us toys when we were younger and clothes once we got older. Memaw's house was AWESOME.

Memaw announced in the last week or so that the oil companies were making an offer to the people in her neighborhood. They would purchase homes from each resident at three times the value listed on the tax rolls. She was not contacted by the companies directly, but rather she saw an article in the newspaper and read documents on the internet. She decided to go ahead and take the offer, although she hadn't been asked yet. She said that it would be foolish not to, and she's right. She's already found a new house as well. She put down a small deposit to hold the house until she can pay for it in full with the cash she'll be getting, which I'm sure she plans to distribute, in part, among her grandkids and new great-grandson.

With any luck, someone will buy her house and move it from the concrete slab that it's on to a new location. If not, the purchasers will level it. That's it. Memaw's house is just...gone. All of the numberless memories of Christmastime and sleeping on the mattress in front of the TV and climbing trees and bedtime stories and junky cereal and playing with Papaw no longer have a place to be...they're just a concrete slab and some fruit trees.

Only memories in the aether of my mind's eye.

Married? Me?

Yes, in fact, I did get married, though I, Abby (Conner) Thomas did at one time swear off marriage. Not permanently, I just declared that I probably wouldn't--nor did I care to--marry until my thirties. I was about 20 years old and already knew everything there was to know about the world and myself. Clearly.

Now to the part that "they" refer to as "marital bliss." I'm so excited! I can't wait for the future!!

I thought that since I have been away for so long, I would post some eye candy: pictures of our honeymoon! We went on a Western Caribbean cruise to Jamaica, Grand Cayman, and Cozumel. These are just ones of Jamaica. That's us trail-riding.

Tasty Cakes

Tasty Cakes

Some things on my mind:

1. Does anyone else think that Katie Holmes looks like the rat Jenner from "The Secret of NIMH?" Am I alone on this?

2. JT hasn't updated his blog in a while...I'm thinking I might delete him from my favorites......

3. Addressing envelopes for weddings is tedious. Weddings in general are tedious. Oh, how I do struggle with tedium.

4. Nobody's reading this probably, but I don't care.

5. Just because no one understands you does not mean you are an artist.

6. Oprah is a pseudo-intellectual and pretty self-absorbed. First and foremost, she is an incredible actress. She's got most of America fooled into thinking that she is a woman of substance...Yet, I cannot turn away from the television.

7. The number of websites I check daily after school has increased to an absurd amount: MySpace, Facebook, Google, The Knot, Yahoo, Google again, Blogspot, eBay, and a few more. I'm addicted. Help me.

The Dumb Stuff People Do

One of the reasons why we remember the High School Years:

Every morning, just after the first period bell rings, the loudspeaker comes on and we all recite the Pledge of Allegiance, the Texas Pledge, and then observe a moment of silence.

Yesterday, some skateboarding-type, long-hair, emo students were playing hakky sak before school when their hakky got kicked onto the roof. One Freshman decided to shimmy up a drainpipe onto the roof (over 2 stories up) to retrieve it--and got stuck. Kids were cheering and yelling "jump!". Faculty, principals, & assistant principals were out of their MINDS trying to figure out how to get him down and punish him. The principal was livid.

The first period bell rang and all students went to class, with that guy still up on the roof. As the loudspeaker came on with our morning routine, they were still trying to get him down, but in the middle of all of it, the kid STOPS to recite the pledge, the Texas pledge, and then observe the moment of silence...I must give him credit for relatively good character, just poor, poor judgement. I will say, though, by the time he's a Senior, he'll probably be a living legend.

...He gets out of In-school Suspension sometime in November.

Raindrops on Roses and Whiskers on Kittens......

Hey! I got engaged yesterday...to JT! He's my true love! We're getting married December 23rd. Our theme is Santaland...It's going to be so magical!! Does anyone know where I can get a Rudolph with a blinking red nose...you know, like the claymation version?




....I'm kidding, of course.

My wedding color is black.

Follow-up, Stat.

Is anyone else slightly freaked out by the (now even more) very real concept of nuclear war? Not that I'm going to hunker down in a foxhole and wait for the apocalypse or anything...It just makes me a little nervous that just one crazy guy could totally eff it up for the rest of us by pressing a button. How did we get here, anyway?

So Here's the Long and Short of It

Here's basically what has happened in the last couple of months:

First, I rekindled an old friendship back in April which turned romantic. This, in turn, triggered a chain of events that began with me deciding to move back to Houston, where my boyfriend lives. I quit my carptentry job at Watertower Theatre in Dallas (where my motivation had begun to gradually decline, anyway, and I had serious doubts that they were going to extend my contract) and packed up my stuff, sublet my apartment that I had lived in for barely three months, and moved back home--literally, in with my parents. I landed a job at the High School I graduated from teaching Theatre Arts. Granted, teaching in my hometown was definitely not my first choice, but the starting salary is phenomenal for a first year teacher...more than anywhere else I could have applied (as a matter of tact, I won't reveal exactly how much). So now, I'm working on clearing up my credit so I can buy a car in the fall and move back out of my parents' place by the end of October. I am hoping to also move back to the Dallas area after a couple of years. I never really liked Houston and I miss Dallas already. It was difficult to make the decision to move away in the first place. I guess this is the part of my life where I'm off seeking my fortune. Wish me luck, and to all the friends I left in Big D: I love you guys and I'll be back before you know it.

So this is my new blog to represent my paradigm shift. I hope to do some more serious--and consequently more insightful--writing here. There's just something about MySpace that will not foster that type of revelation in me....now there's a mystery.

In other news: I've begun to capitalize letters that require capitalization according to the English language when I type. You know, like a grown-up.